The Note You’ve Been Waiting For: THE RESET Is Here.
IT’S FINALLY HERE🥳 This note is a quick break from our regularly scheduled Life, Created programming to share something big. The moment you’ve been waiting for...
You have been waiting for this, right?
Last week, we celebrated the fiftieth essay of Life, Created. Yes, with actual confetti, because you know I love that shit. Fifty essays, each a quiet reckoning: with deep loss, with life’s complexities, and with what it means to begin again and… again. Fifty reminders that we don’t need to pretend to be anything other than exactly who we are.
Sharing these weekly stories reminded me how much depth and connection can exist in small, intentional spaces. It also made me realize how much I’ve missed working more closely with folks. For those of you who’ve been with me for years, you’ll remember that I built three separate communities for women starting back in 2014. (Though I closed Dear Grown Ass Women in 2023, that space was much larger and created for a very different purpose.) So gathering folks has always been my jam. And this new offering, while intimate in size, marks a real return. A return to the kind of personal, small-group experience I’ve always loved but haven’t been able to create in a long time. After years of speaking mostly inside companies, with brands, and on large stages, stepping back into a close-knit, community-centered space feels resonant, necessary, and deeply aligned.
It reminded me of a phrase I’ve shared for well over a decade. And while it might sound cliché now, it’s no less true: I am not for everyone. And you are not for everyone either. Most of us understand this in theory, but we forget. We soften our edges. We become more agreeable. We smile in moments that are deeply uncomfortable. We say yes when we want to say no. We begin to believe that being liked is more important than being honest. I did too. Until I couldn’t anymore.
When I left the fashion industry in 2012, life felt relatively frictionless. Words and stages became my medium, and for a while, that was enough. But in 2020, my nephew was killed. Four months later, Mama Shelley died. A month after that, I nearly lost a sibling who had several strokes and went into heart failure. Then came a diagnosis of my own. All of this within a 10-month period. Since then, I’ve quietly mourned the deaths of two aunts, a sibling, and the life I lived in the before times. I haven’t spoken publicly about all of these losses, and I don’t need to. But they’ve shaped me. They’ve changed what I have the capacity for. They’ve made it painfully clear what (and who) I am no longer willing to tolerate. And they’ve brought me back to myself in ways that are not shiny or sweet, but honest and necessary.
This is the foundation of what I’ve created in The Reset: I Am Not For Everyone. It is a rare, three-month experience for a small group of women who are wanting to come back to themselves without performance and without apology.
We begin in September. There will be six live sessions, held every other Monday evening. We will gather to reflect, recalibrate, and talk honestly about what it means to live in alignment with who you are now. Each of you will also receive five one-on-one calls with me during our time together, plus a final call after the Reset is complete. Throughout the experience, I will send you voice notes—short messages that offer support and perspective when you need it most. There will be a private space to connect between sessions, along with replays and written prompts to keep you engaged in a way that feels manageable and useful.
I haven’t offered anything like this in more than six years. I don’t know when I will again. This is intentional and intimate work. It’s not something I always have the bandwidth for. But it is work that matters. This is for folks who want to stop pretending. Who are tired of editing themselves in spaces that were never built with them in mind. Who want something honest, steady, and real.
If this offering resonates with you, I invite you to apply. The group will be intentionally small, with a maximum of twelve women. Applications will be reviewed on a first-come basis, so do not wait until the last minute.
You can read more about The Reset: I Am Not For Everyone and submit your application here.
This is not a surface-level experience, nor is it about productivity hacks or pretending everything is fine. It’s a space for honest conversation, real reflection, and meaningful change—led by me. It’s thoughtful, intentional, and built with care. And if you’re wanting something that meets you where you actually are, without the noise and without the performance, I’d be honored to have you in this small but mighty group of women.
If you have questions, you’re welcome to reply to this note. Or, if you’re ready to apply but want to connect first, just include a note in your application and I’ll be in touch. I look forward to reading your applications.
That’s all for now.
I’ll be in Texas at the end of this week, giving a talk to a group of women lawyers all about Microjoys and surviving ridiculous times with some semblance of grace. But I’ll be back to our regularly scheduled essays next week.
Every essay features a section called “One Fine Microjoy” – an experience, place, or thing that brings me joy, grace, and hope amidst life’s ups and downs. I hope it invites you to recognize and appreciate the delights that ground, inspire, and enrich our journey.
Though there isn’t an essay this week, there’s always time for a microjoy. #AmIRight?! While the weather’s still warm, Ira and I have weekly dinners in the park. He works in New York City, so I pick him up from the train with a picnic ready: wine and all the accoutrement on hand. It ain’t fancy but it sure feels lovely. It’s a limited seasonal microjoy, but one that makes the suburbs feel a little bit magical.
Welcome to Life, Created.
With love, wisdom [and small mercies] from Montclair. xx
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